There’s a saying that holding on to bad memories only allows the people who hurt you to hurt you even longer. They’ve moved on and you’re still stuck. And in pain.
My father had an affair and instead of just leaving he did despicable, unforgivable things to cover it up. My Mum deserved better. We all deserved better.
My Mum kept the papers she found as evidence. She never used them for anything; she just kept them. I think she needed to feel in herself that it had really happened.
When Mum died I kept the evidence. I don’t even know why. I think I was doing it for her. But just now as I was looking at some of it I realised that I have to get rid of it. I have to do it for her sake. I have to do it for my sake.
He hurt her so bad. He hurt me so bad. But now it’s enough. Just simply enough. I will incinerate all this stuff. I hope it helps my Mum rest in peace. I hope it gives me peace to know it’s gone.
Keeping it doesn’t mean anything. Getting rid of it means everything. It says so much. It means he is fully gone from her life and from mine. She couldn’t let go so I’m going to let go for her.
It’s actually very liberating.
My mother kept all my fathers text messages to his mistress and gave them to our solicitor but never took action. She also has the visa bills with his hotel rooms and meals...I don't know why she keeps it. You were brave to incinirate it. It's releasing the hold it hand on you. Good job!
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