This afternoon I packed up my Mum's jewellery and some of her personal souvenirs that I want to keep. It made me cry to look at them. It's still hard to look at things she wore and loved and know that she's never going to wear them again. But I am going to wear them. Today I'm wearing one of her favourite rings, it's one I'd bought her and it makes me smile to be wearing it.
It's amazing the happiness and sadness to be found in a drawer full of stuff.
I found the funeral service sheet from Mum's funeral, which made me sad:
Then I found the very last Christmas card I gave her and the words in that made me sob. I remember writing it knowing it would be her last Christmas. Things like that are harder than you can even imagine. And I still find it hard to remember that I'll never again have cause to buy a card with Mum on it.
Then I found the tickets from when we went to see We Will Rock You. It was a Christmas present to her from all us three kids and our partners. We took her in March 2008, just a few weeks before she started being ill. I'm so glad we all managed to have that amazing weekend in London together. Mum had always wanted to see this show and she loved it.
And with that was the ticket from when I took Mum to an Elton John concert. She was a huge fan of his and so I couldn't resist getting tickets when I found out he was playing locally. We had seats in the front block and had the best time. He was on stage for over three hours. I'll never forget it as long as I live.
Then there was this poem that Mum had clipped out of a magazine. It made me well up but I love the words and will keep this. Mum found this after her Mum died and she kept it all that time. The words gave her comfort and now they'll do the same for me.
I'm left feeling very reflective. I'm learning to concentrate on remembering all the very many good times though.
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