It's the small things

It's the little things in life that count, I firmly believe that. The smallest gestures are the ones that mean the most.

Saturday was the 2 year anniversary of my Mum's death and I knew that once it got past the first year that the anniversary would be something that only my brothers and I would remember and feel sad over. It's normal and that's ok. But people surprised me in their care and it's meant so much to me. My Mum spent her whole life being there for other people and now some of the people she was there for are being there for me and my brothers.

My Mum's best friend Carol sent me a lovely card on Saturday, it made me cry but it was so nice to know she was thinking of Mum. They were best friends from being young children until ten years ago when Carol did something that my Mum just couldn't forgive. Thankfully they made their peace when Mum was ill and Carol promised she would keep in touch. I didn't think she would be but she has done. She has shown more care than any of my Mum's other friends and even a lot of my family and I am more grateful to her than I know how to express.

My friend Angela, who let me down when Mum was ill, remembered on Saturday and sent me a sweet message to check on me. My brother, who is not the most sensitive of people, text to make sure I was ok. My 'adopted' brother David sent a lovely text remembering Mum. My cousin Kathy emailed me and made me sob with her beautiful words about Mum.

Then yesterday my Grandma (my father's mum) phoned to say she'd been to see my Mum's name in the book in the church and she'd donated money for the flowers. I was so touched that she'd done that because she struggles with getting out and about these days.

And today my Mum's good friend and neighbour Jill phoned me to catch up. She talked a bit about Mum, she said she still misses her.

I posted on twitter and Facebook about Mum and so many people have sent me messages of love and support; they all mean so much to me. It amazes me how many people care.

I just feel so heartened. It's times like these that you are reminded to focus on the people who care and the people who are trying to make amends, and to let go of the people who are never going to be any different than they are.